Day Three

Today was day five of the spending fast, despite the title of the blog.  When I woke up this morning, I told God that I didn’t think that I had faith to believe that He could do something big three days in a row, and I asked Him if He would give me the faith to believe it.  Then I prayed and asked him who and what I was supposed to spend the $7 on today.

He helped me out by letting Whitney decide the first item.  I would watch her perform in her classroom play. However, with Whitney there is always an angle.  She starts by asking a serious of questions, which seem to have nothing to do with each other, and by the time you’ve answered them all you are so worn down, you are happy to give her whatever she wants.  I’ve gotten wise in her 10 years of life, and now I cut to the chase and say, “Just tell me what you want.”  “A donut, because last time when you came to my thing at school, Sean K’s mom brought him a cake pop from Starbucks, and Kate’s mom brought her a donut, and they both ate them right in front of my face, and were like, ‘Mmmm,’ right in front of me.” Yeah, she's really that good.  I'm doomed when she becomes a teenager.  “You want a donut?” “Yes.” “Are you sure?  Really sure? Ok, I’ll bring you a donut.”

Then, I thought about Dessea. Dessea’s a girl in Whitney’s class whose dad is in prison.  And Raven.  On the field trip neither Dessea nor Raven had money to spend in the gift shop.  And I thought about how devastated Whitney felt when someone ate a donut in front of her, and about the lesson I am learning through this fast about spending on others when I spend on myself, and I couldn’t just bring only Whitney a donut.  I’d have to bring Dessea, and Raven, and Kate, and Addy, and Sean K……I’d have to bring donuts for the whole class.  I didn’t tell Whitney, I just kept it a secret.

Shipley Donuts wanted $6.50 for one dozen of donuts.  Dang it.  I needed two, and I was sure that while I was trying to decide what I should do, the ladies behind the counter were making fun of me in their native language.  (They may not have been, but it sure felt like it.) So, I left and was glad I did when I found a big ole bargain at Walmart.  $3.49 for a dozen of assorted (the good stuff) donuts.  In other words, 2 dozen for 7 bucks! Yes, pick me!  I also wanted a donut, so I used my first purchase of the day on myself to buy a $0.50 donut for me, and a $.050 cherry turnover for Whitney’s teacher.

After the play, I ran to Walgreen’s to get mailing envelopes.  As I was walking into the store, I told myself; this isn’t for me, so it doesn’t count towards my $7 total.  I needed envelopes for the dogs’ paperwork to send to Hawaii.  So really, it was for the dogs.  At least that’s what I told myself. “Right, God, it’s for the dogs?  That’s how I see it.  That’s not how you see it?”  “Ok, I’ll count it towards my seven.”  And all the while I’m thinking who would ever want a package of envelopes anyway.  Someone was going to be like, “Oh, a package of envelopes, you shouldn’t have…really, you shouldn’t have, what am I going to do with a package of envelopes?”

As I start to drive away, I realize I’m going to the post office.  People at post offices need envelopes. So, maybe it’s not such a stupid idea after all. In getting my own package ready to mail, I couldn’t tell that anyone needed an envelope.  As a last ditch effort, I asked a lady in line if she wanted them, and she said, “Sure, I could always use envelopes.”  Not incredibly dramatic, but at least I gave them to somebody.

It’s already lunch time by the time I’m driving to the next place.  I tried to do the mental math (not easy for visual thinker me, and especially while I’m driving) fifty cents plus $2.19…that’s …..and I feel like I’m being chastised for being chintzy. Ok, $3.00.  So, that gives me…uh….$4 left.  I told you, I’m not good with math in my head.  I wonder if I could get lunch for $4?  As I drive past Church’s Chicken I felt like I should stop, but I wasn't very hungry so I kept going, and wouldn’t you know, it seemed like everyone was trying to get in my lane with me in it.  “What’s going on?”  And suddenly, I felt out of God’s will for not stopping for lunch.  Back to Church’s I went.  I really hoped I could afford a soda with lunch.  A chicken sandwich combo on the menu looked especially divine.  Guess the price?  You got it.  $4  I order two with Dr. Peppers and fries.  When I get to my destination, I looked for anyone to give it to.  I asked a lady in the parking lot if she had lunch, but she had already eaten.  Then there was a car behind the building sitting with the doors open.  A man and his granddaughter were waiting for someone inside.  I asked if they were hungry, and they had already eaten.  I drove around to the front, parked, and got out.  I walked around, and felt ridiculous for carrying a chicken sandwich and a Dr. Pepper, with no one to give it to.  I prayed, “Lord, is there anyone that needs this sandwich?” I turned around to go back, and a man joined me on the side walk.  He was carrying a subway sandwich and a Dr. Pepper.  He seemed nice, and I let him pass me.  Just as he was about to go inside a door, I asked him, “Where are you going with that lunch?”  “I work here,” he replied.  “Is there anyone else in there?”  “What do you need,” he asked me?  “I need to find someone to give this sandwich to.” “There’s no one in there that needs a sandwich,” he confidently told me.  Then I saw a lady from the inside looking at us suspiciously.  “But are there other workers in there,” I asked?  “Yeah, but no one needs lunch, I don’t think…” “Just trust me, someone needs this sandwich,” and I practically forced him to take it, if only, so I didn’t have to deal with it anymore.

You know after I gave away the envelopes and the sandwich today, I felt relieved.  I was under so much stress when they were still in my possession.  I didn’t need two packages of envelopes, and I didn’t need two chicken sandwiches.  Having more than I needed was a burden.  Today I didn’t get to see the rest of the story.  I didn’t get to see who ate the sandwich, and I don’t know if the lady at the post office truly needed those envelopes.  I didn’t see the big picture, I was only the middle man or better yet, middle lady. However, I can trust that my God does see the big picture, and because He showed me yesterday at how perfectly orchestrated His plan was,  I can be assured His plan today was just as perfect.  I think that is called growing in my faith.  Uh, huh…the answer to my prayer this morning.  Thanks God, I get it.